All that Glitters is not Returnable

Who knew that jewellery could be such a pain in the butt? I took three of my rings into a jewellery store that shall remain nameless (Ben Moss) the other day. Ok….maybe not so nameless. I had been wearing my wedding rings on my right hand because it is bigger and they kept sliding off so I decided that it was time to have them sized. Also, my white gold right hand rings were too big and since I just got them in September and I love love love them, they needed fixing too! REWIND….

For my birthday I decided that I really wanted a white gold Right Hand ring. Since Michael had just started working at Sears and we get a big discount there, I thought I would check them out. The Cheapy Charley in me loves the reduced section so I headed there first, where I fell in love. It was that instant kind of love where my eyes met multiple diamonds and the rest of the world softened and muted and I could picture me and the rings taking long walks on the beach, laying in bed staring at one another, laughing at the same crazy things…you know. What can I say; my Mama raised me to appreciate da bling. Things escalated and soon there were two of them and they totally ganged up on me. Take us both home…I can be for your ring finger and Mr. Butterflies Leaves, Filigree and Diamonds would inhabit your thumb! Who am I to argue with talking rings, right? So I bought them both and told Michael that he had found me the perfect birthday and anniversary gifts but that he didn’t want to wait the two weeks till my b’day or three months till our anniversary but that he was giving them to me as soon as they got back from being sized. He didn’t realize that he had put that much thought into it, but quickly came to see how wise and right a decision he had made.

Soon however, as in all relationships, things took a turn. One of the diamonds on the shank fell out and when I took it to Trent, master of all jewellers, he said it had a crack in the side as well. Everyone changes, right. The diamond could not be replaced, but no one else could see it. Sears flat out refused to do anything about it either. They would not pay for the break to be repaired because it was a clearance item and clearance apparently means “We washed our hands of it like an unwed pregnant daughter in the 1940’s. You kids are on your own!” My powers of persuasion were wasted on them, they would not be moved! Then came the weight loss and they languished in my drawer. Alone, but not forgotten.

At Christmas time I was at Wal-Mart where I was romanced by a pair of crystal encrusted gold hoop earrings. It was Sears all over again…drool on the counter, gazing at the twinkling stones…. Swipers Wrist or no, out came the card. I took them home, wrapped them up with shiny paper and ribbons, wrote a beautiful card and took it to Michael to sign. He has really great taste! (He picked me out all by himself!) Christmas morning I was basically vibrating in anticipation! Then, they were resting in my lobes and we have rarely been apart since then. Until….last week I took them out to clean them and noticed that they looked like gap toothed old hags! There were green spots where the Swarkovski’s had inhabited! One frantic call to Wal-Mart and my hopes were puddle around my ankles like the gap toothed hags hosiery. They would do NOTHING about it! Pierced earrings, 30 day full and 90 day limited return were all terms that were bandied about. They now are on the shelf under my Gilmore Girls Season 6. I can’t bear to look at them.

The dude that was supposed to be sizing my Right Hand ring won’t do it. In addition to the one missing diamond and cracked shank, it apparently has a chipped diamond and several loose baguettes. (You’ve heard what they say about the French…loose, every one of them.) So now it will make the walk of shame back to me where I will take it to Last Chanceville, aka Trent the Amazing and we will see if he can work something out.

Things Tina Has Learned:

-jewellery is meant to be bought at Jewellery stores…they stand behind their product

-when the jeweller says it costs $30 to size rings, soldered together wedding rings do not count as one ring. It costs $90 when there are three. (or $30 if you burst into tears because they did not tell you that at the get go.)

-when dealing with reduced merchandise, find out if it is “as is”

So now what do I do? I doubt that there will be time for Trent to get it fixed in the two weeks that we will be in Tisdale, and who knows if he will even be able to? The white gold butterfly ring is lonely without its friend, and my ears are naked.

I did share a moment with a white gold ring in Ben Moss the other day though. Peridot and blue topaz...diamond shaped stones...stairway style…birthday coming up...on sale...hmmm. Oh Miicchhaaeell....hhuunneeyyy...all you need to do is sign the card! Ben Moss giftwraps!